New Mom…now what?! Helpful tips for new moms

On February 3rd, 2020 my life changed forever. I was thrust into a world of unknown. The first two days in the hospital had me feeling like a champion- I could do this. It did not seem that bad with all the nurses popping in and out of my room, my parents who came to visit and help me, and the extra hands of my husband having time off from work. I was quickly humbled on February 5th when we were discharged and sent home. I realized this wasn’t easy, there was a lot I needed to figure out. Those first days, first weeks, and the first two months were so challenging but rewarding. There were a lot of things I discovered and I want to share them with other first time mamas. Although I do not have the answers for everything, it is my prayer this blog post alleviates some of the anxiety and worry that comes with this new territory. Some things you will have to figure out as you go, others can be figured out with tips and so I am listing some. No matter what: YOU’VE GOT THIS! You are already a GREAT MOM just by virtue of the fact you have read and researched and prepared thus far. New mama, you’re amazing. Now, let’s get into my little tips. I have divided this blog into (7) areas where I have little tricks and hacks. I do share links you can click on and those links are emboldened. At the end, I will offer my miscellaneous advice and money-saving tips. Let’s get into it with the most important area: feeding.

Feeding- feeding a new baby is the most important area. After all, babies are real people with real hunger. This post is not designed to discuss whether or not you should or should not breastfeed–that is YOUR choice, mama. As I have openly shared on my Instagram page, breastfeeding did not work for us. I tried, and it was so painful for me and for her. When I finally got over the guilt of not being able to feed her that way, I turned to the Enfamil Gentlease formula. It was and still proves to be the best choice I made for my baby. You, mama, have to figure out what works for you and your baby. Once you have, feeding will become a tad bit easier. No matter how you choose to do it: a fed baby is a happy baby. FED IS BEST! Now, if you are formula feeding this first tip is for you. The most lifesaving hack I discovered was a formula dispenser. THIS HAS BEEN A GAME CHANGER! No fumbling over formula cans in the middle of the night, you can pre-prepare if you need to travel, and this saves a lot of time when a hungry baby is well, hungry. All you do is pre-scoop out the appropriate amount so when it is time to make a bottle all you have to do is add your nursery water. The second best game-changer for feeding has been the boppy lounger. Sometimes, my arms get tired and I just cannot hold Sophia up to feed her. This pillow has been phenomenal. It is a lounger for relaxing but also works great for bottle feeding. Get one. Get two if you are like me and want one for every room you may feed the baby in. If your baby is unusually fussy specifically at night, he or she may have colic/gas. Sophia had horrible bouts with this, which meant many hard nights for us as her parents. Gas is not completely unavoidable but the type of bottle you use if you are going to bottle feed can make the world of the difference. After trying many bottles and failing, we tried the Philips Avent Anti-Colic bottles. These are bottles with an insert to trap bubbles that cause colic/gas. These are the best bottles! I wish I would have had them from the start. These are what I use exclusively and highly recommend. You can also do gas drops if you choose-they do not have to be name brands as we use the CVS brand and it works great. Again, just a suggestion….but these work. Also, directly correlated sometimes is congestion. Sometimes colicky babies have severe congestion too. Sophia did, and still sometimes has bouts with congestion and mucus. Recently I discovered saline drops for baby noses and it has been a game-changer. It breaks up mucus and she digests milk better. Double win.

Next up is sleeping. Babies sleep A LOT. It may not seem like they do because they are awake every other hour or every two hours or so in the beginning but they really do sleep a lot. That being said, babies are little people…they just cannot express themselves the way big people (adults) do. It is up to you as a mama to try to figure out what is best for your baby(ies) in every area including sleeping. This blog is not here to discuss whether or not you should or should not co-sleep. That is your choice (we co-sleep and have done so since the very beginning with a side sleeper bassinet now turned mini crib). What is universal across the board is establishing comfort in sleep. As an adult you like to be comfortable when sleeping right? Naturally, a baby is the same way. My go-to’s were and still are cotton, breathable zip-up PJs. Whether or not you use ones that have no scratch sleeves for the hands and foot ends for the feet are your choice but I have found two-way zip-ups to be the most effective thing for sleeping (single zipper PJs are great too). Also, they make for easy diaper changes in the middle of the night–no fumbling with snaps or buttons…easy off, easy on. Additionally, in the beginning, babies have strong reflexes that often startle them out of their own sleep. They are learning to control their bodies and so jerky, sudden movements happen. This is where swaddling is a Godsend. Swaddling can be done with a regular blanket, actual swaddling blanket, or swaddle pods. Swaddle pods were my absolute favorite for Sophia. They are armless blankets that have a two-way zipper. There is no fighting to get arms and legs in and out, and that thing keeps them from moving every which way. I loved it and when she outgrew it internally I said womp womp,womp *cues the violins like a sad story is being narrated* Swaddle pods were so good. My hubby hated them and called them “straight jackets” but I always reminded him that the “straight jackets” helped her sleep AND helped us sleep!

Also important to figure out is what your plan for diapering and changing is. We do disposable diapers and wipes from Pampers Pure and Pampers Swaddlers because there is an indicator on the pamper when the diaper needs to be changed, and these are the ones that work best for us. You will figure out what works for you; whether its cloth or disposable diapers and what kind of wipes you’ll want to use. Worthy of mentioning is the fact most babies do not like changing tables…mine included. She cried and screamed every single time we tried to lay her on the changing table and eventually we discovered the trauma her birth (being shoved under lights on a table to get the umbilical cord cut off her after it was doubly wrapped around her neck and suffocating her) stuck with her. We switched to a portable change pad that stretches out across our bed and we have not had any issues with changing her ever since. Not only is the changing pad easier to clean, but I also believe it is safer for the baby. The changing table was considerably high off the ground and could pose a danger if you have a squirmer who moves quickly and often as my squirmer Sophia does. Other helpful tips for diaper changing in the very beginning are a wipes warmer in case your baby fusses over cold wipes, Aquaphor diaper cream to guard against diaper rash, and also buying a size up in diapers. I do not recommend buying ‘newborn’ size diapers because babies grow so quickly. Start out with size 1 diapers in whatever brand you choose so that the baby has room, and when poopie diapers happen the poop is not so messy and semi contained in the diaper.

Next up is bathing. Now bathing seems like it would be a no brainer but it can be tricky. ‘So when do I give my baby their actual first real bath?’ It really depends on how the baby’s umbilical cord stump has healed. It could be anywhere from a few days to a few weeks after the cord has been cut. For us, we could not submerse Sophia into a real bath for 2.5 weeks because her umbilical cord did not properly heal and her pediatrician [who happened to be my pediatrician when I was a child] had to cauterize it. Basically, to cauterize the umbilical cord stump is a quick and generally painless procedure where a doctor will apply medicine to prevent it from getting infected or getting further infected if it already was. In our case, Sophia’s was infected and was not healing correctly. It was obvious to me that it wasn’t healing, too. The stump kept crusting and oozing pus, and the skin around it was raw. I sponge bathed her on a towel- using a small cup of water and baby soap and dipping her washrags into it to gently “bathe” all of her body. I bathed all of her body except the area around her belly just to be sure. I did this every 3 days, but you can sponge bathe every 2-5 days until that stump heals. After that you can bathe 2x or 3x a week at your discretion. If you live in a colder climate, stretch out the days between baths so you do not dry out your baby’s skin. At bath time I use several products including but not limited to Aveeno’s line of baby bath care and Babyganics line of bath care. You can bathe your baby in a baby tub or a sink – totally your choice. We do a combination of both. I love the Blooming Bath flower (we have a pink one in not so surprising news) and it’s great because it does not require too much maintenance and is washable itself. I also have a baby tub with a sling because sometimes, it is easier to kneel in the tub to bathe her than stand over my sink–it sometimes depends on how I feel and that determines what method I use to bathe her. Both work just fine for me.

With bathing comes skincare. Baby skin is so delicate and sensitive so the first point I want to make is if your baby ends up with some sort of skin issue whether it be baby acne, eczema, drool rash, dry skin, peeling, or anything else…don’t freak out. 99% of babies experience some sort of skin ailment in the first year of their life. Sophia has had brief bouts of eczema and baby acne on an ongoing basis. I do not use prescribed medication because she is so small and her body is still developing. What I use for her baby acne is Aquaphor ointment; which doubles as an amazing soother of drool rash once your baby starts to drool. For eczema[after I had it confirmed by the pediatrician that that’s what it was] I got Aveeno’s eczema care for babies. It is phenomenal and I highly recommend it. Remember, do not panic if you see pimples, spots, dead flaky skin, or anything else. This is normal! Of course, if something really looks horribly wrong, if the baby is uncontrollably in pain at each time you bathe or put something against or on the skin: see the doctor immediately.

Without question, hair care is also important for little people first emerging into the world. Some babies are born with heads full of hair, while others are born with none. No matter how much or how little your baby is born with, you want to take care of it so it can grow and be healthy. I have to mention that it is 100000000000% normal for babies to shed hair in the first year, especially in the back. Because of the friction of laying on their backs so much, the spot where their heads lay most frequently is the spot where the head will shed the most. My most important point for hair care is to make sure headbands, bows, turbans, and hats are not to tight. Too much elastic can be problematic. The next important thing is to select shampoos and conditioners that will not irritate the baby’s face or forehead. I recently (2.5 months in) discovered LaJAshley hair care and I am OVERJOYED about it. It is a natural hair care line that did not even start out as baby hair care but has proven to be the best thing out there for baby hair. Sophia had an INSANE amount of cradle cap (dandruffy, peeling scalp and hairline) and after just 3 times of using the moisturizing shampoo, the deep conditioner, and the leave-in conditioner I noticed that cradle cap is GONE! I also use the hair elixir for styling when I want to slay and lay her edges (I use a soft-bristled baby toothbrush or my fingers when I am pressed for time). Perhaps the most important reason to consider LaJAshley products is for the rewards on your purchases. I am all about free products and saving money and that is exactly what you can do with this.

Last but certainly not least is clothing. I saved the most fun part for last. Dressing your baby is like dressing a doll except dolls do not smell as bad as these tiny humans do when they poop. But, dressing them up can be so much fun whether you have a baby boy or baby girl! My tips for dressing babies are for starters, do not buy a lot of newborn sized clothes. Again, these little people grow so fast so they will not be in newborn size too long. My suggestion would be to buy size 0-3 months and 3 months to start. If you are going to get newborn sized clothes, get them preloved or handed down from a friend, relative, or even a good thrift store. I run an online thrift store called Babies on Budgets, and I sell new and gently used baby clothes and kids clothes. Newborn sizes go quickly, but I do stock up on them. I do have sizes all the way to 5T so you’ll find great deals to stock up for as babies grow. The best part? The majority of my items are less than $10. I started this to help other moms and dads save money because baby clothes can be pricey. Other thrift websites are thredUp and Kidizen. With Kidizen, you can actually buy AND sell used kid’s clothes; so as your baby gets bigger and outgrows his or her clothes, you can sell them on Kidizen for more clothes. Unless you plan to donate the clothes outgrown, this is a great way to make a small amount of extra cash. Facebook market is also a treasure trove of kid’s clothes if you take the time to look. 95% of Sophia’s clothes are thrifted, and I am not ashamed of that! Clothing is the fun part and there is so much to choose from. It is all about personal style. The only must-haves are onesies (side snap ones are great while you wait for the umbilical cord stump to heal), no-scratch mittens (small socks work great on their hands too), and zip-up PJs as we already shared.

The last bits of information I have to share are tips for couponing/ money-saving and creating an atmosphere for baby to be calm in. For couponing, I learned from Mommies That Save. Couponing on this magnitude is new for me and this is the blog I go to for ‘how-to’ save on everything child and household-related. I have gotten wipes for incredibly cheap on amazon and other sites using her tips. They work.

Another helpful thing is lullabies for putting the baby to sleep or soothing. You want to create an atmosphere that allows the baby to sleep peacefully. Soft music is great for that. We love Hidden in My Heart; an audio cd of lullabies through Scripture. It is so soothing, it makes hubby and me sleepy too! Another great one is the Praise Baby DVD collection. Praise Baby is great during the day/ active play because it is film and song.

These are just some tips and things that helped me in the first few months. I am still learning as we GROW along, and the more helpful things I learn I hope to be able to share with you. You’ve got this, mom. Take deep breaths and remember this is new for both of you. I hope this post has helped with at least one thing and answered one question. Hugs and congratulations on that beautiful baby of yours!